why does this have to be weird?
by Thursdaymorningchild
Summary: Spoilers for 1x12? The aforementioned weird bar incident... John's drunk and Dorian is there to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.


**Hi so this is my first fanfic ever eek. Atm it's unbetaed but hopefully i'll get a beta soon , I was too impatient to wait lol. I don't own any of the characters of this awesome show, if I did then it would definitely be renewed by now. I suck at formatting sorry and I'm new to this site :/ :/**

**Hope you like it?**  
**Enjoy!**  
**Emm xx**

"So _this _is where you've been hiding. I should have known."

John bit back a sigh as he looked up from his half empty beer bottle, and into the piercing pale eyes of his partner. Dorian was standing across the table from him, arms crossed over his chest and stature stiff, still not accustomed to being re-commissioned then.

"M'not hiding. Needed a drink."

"Sure man, whatever you say."

This time John did sigh and kicked out the opposite chair, nodding at it before taking a gulp of lukewarm alcohol.

He may have neglected to mention that it was his fifth drink of the night but Dorian didn't need to know every damn detail of his life and besides his sensors probably picked it up before he even spoke.

"Sit down then, last thing I need is a dick picking a fight cause you don't look like you fit in."

Dorian's left eye twitched, unnoticeable if John hadn't already been looking at his face, but the other male obediently perched himself down on the seat.

"John..."

"Nope, shush. No talking in the bar. You're my robot and you have to do what I say. "

Dorian rolled his eyes and did a customary scan of the other clientele of the place. Three barely of age girls were standing in the far corner, trying not to make it obvious that they were leering at the surly detective. One of them caught Dorian's eye and blushed, turning away to take a sip of her ridiculous looking drink.

"Can we just this once override that rule, please?"

The feel of John's hand on his mouth was a strange one. His skin was rough and slightly salty tasting. Synthetic or not, Dorian had emotions and his tongue was clearly well aware of this fact as it seemed itching to dart out and lick the palm.

He bit back on that urge though. He might not be human but he had a good idea what a human that owned a handgun could do to him.

The human in question was glaring at him, using his free hand to chug down the last remnants of beer. Another bottle replaced the empty one and he watched as John winked at the pretty barmaid. She glanced at their position, looking vaguely amused when John refused to remove his hand.

"Can I get you anything else sugar?"

Her voice was low and sultry, and quite frankly grating on Dorian's last nerve. He jerked his head away and fixed her with his best no shit expression.

"We're good here, thank you."

With a nonchalant shrug and flip of dark hair, the young woman bounced off back towards the bar counter.

"What'cha do that for?"

The annoyed pout was in no way adorable, and Dorian moved to place the bottle out of John's reach before he could pick it up.

"I think you've had enough for today John."

In one fluid motion, Dorian had stood up and had John's arm round his shoulders, arm wrapped around his waist so that he could support the intoxicated man, no other reason than that whatsoever.

* * *

"Dudeee, have I ever told you how pretty your eyes are?"

"No. I seem to recall you saying that you liked dark eyes though, and last time I checked during my upgrade they were not in that category."

"I can change my mind. Oopsie!"

Dorian bit his lip, as he helped John upright himself. As much as he'd rather his partner didn't drink himself into an early grave, he had to admit it was certainly endearing to see John a little more relaxed.

"Careful of the pavement man."

"The pavement should be careful of me!"

"Really?"

"Hell yeah. But anyway, your eyes dude. Look at me."

John stopped walking, forcing Dorian to halt right in the middle of the street. The detective moved his arm so that they were both hooked around the android's neck, and leaned in to the personal space that he had frequently established the boundaries of.

"John? I don't think you should..."

The rest of his sentence was cut off by John's mouth on his. He had no experience of kissing or being kissed, of course, but it wasn't entirely unpleasant. John tasted of beer and the faint linger of mint chewing gum. The man's eyes were closed and Dorian followed suit, allowing himself to surrender to the intimate moment. He knew the right thing to do was to gently ease John off of him and take the drunk man back to his apartment. But his circuits seemed to have stopped responding in the metaphoric sense, and John started this, it was his responsibility to end it.

The kiss ended too soon for either man's liking, and John drew back far enough to be able to look in Dorian's eyes. He ran his tongue across his lips and cleared his throat.

"Okay?"

His breathing pattern was slightly off, and Dorian hesitantly reached out to stroke the taller man's cheek, smiling as hazel eyes fluttered shut again before blinking back at him.

"Yes I'm okay John, you?"

"Yeah."

A flash of white teeth accompanied the answer and Dorian grinned back, he dropped his hand from John's face, only slightly surprised when warm fingers entwined with his.

"Wanna come charge at mine?"

"I'd like that."

John bumped his shoulder against Dorian's as they resumed their walk down the street. It felt natural, somehow to be holding hands with someone who wasn't fully human.

"There's one condition to this though."

"What's that?"

"If you tell Paul about this, I will shoot to pieces."

Dorian grinned and gave John's hand a reassuring squeeze.

"That's a risk I'm willing to take."


End file.
